5 years and one week ago today I arrived in Tenerife

[Jackie]

Five years ago today I arrived here to live. I had in tow three suitcases, a daughter and a dog……..oh and a husband. My heart has always been in Tenerife and I knew from my first visit many years ago that I would live here one day. My youngest son joined us a couple of months after we initially moved here and finished his schooling at Wingate but has never really settled even though he has plenty of mates here. When he’s here he wants to be in the UK and when in the UK he wants to be here lol. He spends quite a bit of time in the UK working at the moment and I think he will eventually settle back there, especially as his girlfriend is also there at Uni. He’s coming back with his girlfriend in May for the summer but I think when she goes back at the end of August he will join her.
My daughter on the other hand is the total opposite. She has mainly Canarian friends and has integarated really well and within less than a year of being here said if ever I moved from Tenerife she wouldn’t be coming with me as this is home for her now. She’s been living with her Canarian boyfriend for the last 6 months and is really settled.
For me though I really don’t know. I have some great friends both on and off the forum, I have a job that I enjoy with a great boss, a laugh a minute bunch of work mates and a pretty good social life but this last couple of months there’s something missing for me and I don’t know what it is. Almost everything is going so perfectly for me at the moment and I’m happier in myself than I’ve been for ages thanks to a much needed kick up the ar5e so I don’t know if I’m just missing my family and mates in England more than normal at the moment, if it’s a bit of Island Fever (only been off it for a total of 10 days since moving here) or the fact that the kids have flown the nest and it feels slightly empty and lonely. My plan for the very near future is to put the house in the hills on the market once I have finalized a couple of things in the UK then once it’s sold rent in civilization for a while to see if I can find the something that’s missing, whatever that is lol. If I find it beforehand then I’ll look at buying a property down there rather than renting. I really don’t know at this stage what the future holds for me, just feeling a bit lost and unsettled at the moment….I just hope whatever it is that’s missing jumps up and bites me hard on the bum real soon because I know in my heart this is where I belong and who's to say I would find what's missing anywhere else.

[cainaries]

Hope you sort it out, Jackie! I think most of us have days when we would like to be back in the UK for a while ... or even just living a few hundred metres lower down.

[tracy hampshire]

cainaries is right we all feel like that from time to time, but it has probably hit you harder with the kids flying the nest, i think it hits most mums, so you maybe would feel no different if you were back in the uk, chin up xxxx

[Megaloo]

I think ~Tracy is right, the kids flying the nest is probably a lot to do with it really, one gets that feeling wherever you are living, it is a very big hole they leave.

I hope you can sort things and be settled again soon, at least you have a job so I think that is half the battle with a lot of people that are of working age.

[Suej]

Five years ago today I arrived here to live. I had in tow three suitcases, a daughter and a dog……..oh and a husband. My heart has always been in Tenerife and I knew from my first visit many years ago that I would live here one day. My youngest son joined us a couple of months after we initially moved here and finished his schooling at Wingate but has never really settled even though he has plenty of mates here. When he’s here he wants to be in the UK and when in the UK he wants to be here lol. He spends quite a bit of time in the UK working at the moment and I think he will eventually settle back there, especially as his girlfriend is also there at Uni. He’s coming back with his girlfriend in May for the summer but I think when she goes back at the end of August he will join her.
My daughter on the other hand is the total opposite. She has mainly Canarian friends and has integarated really well and within less than a year of being here said if ever I moved from Tenerife she wouldn’t be coming with me as this is home for her now. She’s been living with her Canarian boyfriend for the last 6 months and is really settled.
For me though I really don’t know. I have some great friends both on and off the forum, I have a job that I enjoy with a great boss, a laugh a minute bunch of work mates and a pretty good social life but this last couple of months there’s something missing for me and I don’t know what it is. Almost everything is going so perfectly for me at the moment and I’m happier in myself than I’ve been for ages thanks to a much needed kick up the ar5e so I don’t know if I’m just missing my family and mates in England more than normal at the moment, if it’s a bit of Island Fever (only been off it for a total of 10 days since moving here) or the fact that the kids have flown the nest and it feels slightly empty and lonely. My plan for the very near future is to put the house in the hills on the market once I have finalized a couple of things in the UK then once it’s sold rent in civilization for a while to see if I can find the something that’s missing, whatever that is lol. If I find it beforehand then I’ll look at buying a property down there rather than renting. I really don’t know at this stage what the future holds for me, just feeling a bit lost and unsettled at the moment….I just hope whatever it is that’s missing jumps up and bites me hard on the bum real soon because I know in my heart this is where I belong and who's to say I would find what's missing anywhere else.

If it's any consolation Jackie I feel the same every so often! As I said before on another thread it is lovely living here but Tenerife can seem very, very small at times and I find the scenery very samey! are we just taking our lives for granted? living in the sun with mostly blue skies every day and never really feeling cold?! I look right out at the ocean where I live but hardly take any notice of it any more, when I pull the shutters up in the morning I don't even look out to remind myself how lovely it is! I think your feelings are totally normal! Don't watch escape to the Country! it always make me a bit homesick! Think of all the horrible things in the UK and the reasons why you left in the first place you will soon feel right as rain (Sun in our case) :D

[bonitatime]

If you can try to get away for a few days
When things are up and down I find this helps. It allows me to think about the things I love on the island and why I came.
Not sure it matters where you go.

[christa]

I agree with all that's been said already, a touch of island fever too perhaps?

May I suggest a holiday / mini break but not to the UK, Even a trip to the mainland or another island will do you the world of good.

Also..... I hate to mention this in fear of you taking offence, cos that's the last thing I want you to do, but is it possible the ole menopause stuff is kicking in?
Spoken from experience. 8-)

[Jackie]

Thanks ladies....It's not that I miss the UK itself because I don't, I'm just missing certain people there at the moment, especially my two boys. They were both here in November for my eldests birthday and it was the first time that my three kids have been together with me for three years, there's always been one of them in the UK when the other one is here. I know they've all got to fly the nest at some time but it's just being so far away from them I think that's the hardest. I'm not down or anything as I said I'm the happiest i've been for a long time...there's just something niggling.

Christa you say not a break to the UK but the couple of times I've been back I couldn't wait to come home so maybe that's the answer, quick trip back to see people, plenty of retail therapy...I do miss the shops in London lol there's nothing to compare here sadly, then bobs your uncle sorted. No offence taken on the menopause comment I'm too young haha..no seriously I have not felt like punching anyone just for the sake of it recently so I take it that's not the problem lol

[Margaretta]

Jackie I remember you from another Forum before you joined TF and moved to Tenerife. I read about all the processes of your move enviously and have enjoyed reading about your experiences in 'them thar hills!'

I'll talk subjectively for a moment. Having travelled to and fro for six years now I'm beginning to think that this is ideal although it's not my dream. The driving rain and real cold here for the last two weeks has made me long for Tenerife but my only child, my daughter, is still living at home and pursuing a great career so it's always exciting to come home and see her although we worry from afar. She would be very happy for us to move to Tenerife as she says it's easy to travel to and fro. But she does have a busy life and we don't see a lot of her. Maybe this will be the case with your sons? It's really breathing fresh air when we get off the plane at Gatwick and that wonderful warmth when we arrive at Tenerife South.

Loneliness is a strange state because you can be surrounded by people and yet feel very alone. I suppose keeping busy really helps and joining new things. Maybe you do need a bit more buzz? Maybe your poor friend with depression is worrying you at the moment and having a bit of an effect.

Sounds like you need more holidays. Jackie, 'get off yer butt' and book some flights or visit some of the other islands.... or the Veronicas!! Use your friends...they won't mind....and have some outrageous fun. Thinking of you but don't make any very big decisions until you've got to the root of the problem.xx

[Jackie]

aww thanks Margaretta, funny I was thinking about how long I have 'known' some of you on here, I know you Blue Marlin and myself go back probably 6 years or more from the other place. If I remember rightly Blue Marlin and myself got banned lol. Going to leave it a while but will definately be booking a holiday somewhere, be it back to the UK to see people or somewhere else i'm not sure yet. Don't worry about the outrageous fun, there is plenty of that planned over the next few months at least, and the weekends there are no nights out for celebrations of one kind or another have been designated as nights out just because haha, well it would be rude not too. x

[blue marlin]

I remember them days too haha

[Jackie]

I remember them days too haha

haha Kay I'm sure it was your fault we got banned lol ;)

[blue marlin]

haha Kay I'm sure it was your fault we got banned lol ;)

i'm sure it was too bit cheeky in them days ;)

[jogger321]

I remember you too Jackie from the other forum. You had a husband that was a sparky if i'm correct. Did he ever move with you to Tenerife?

[Jackie]

i'm sure it was too bit cheeky in them days ;)


Remember you on there as well planning your move here, think you moved here in the December. Then by coincidence our girls met up and I suddenly had another daughter living here lol. Hope everything is good for you all back there x

Added after 3 minutes:


I remember you too Jackie from the other forum. You had a husband that was a sparky if i'm correct. Did he ever move with you to Tenerife?

Getting worried now lol I don't remember you haha, are we talking about HT forum here? Yeah you're right, I had a husband that was a sparky and no he never moved here permanently.

[blue marlin]

Things going ok as can be work is getting worse by the day would never believe how much the betting shop industry has changed over the years depressing rain today yes great that the girls got on so well thanks for looking after her like your own x bit sad this week as we had to have our beloved Jack Russel Scully to sleep yesterday :(

[Jackie]

Things going ok as can be work is getting worse by the day would never believe how much the betting shop industry has changed over the years depressing rain today yes great that the girls got on so well thanks for looking after her like your own x bit sad this week as we had to have our beloved Jack Russel Scully to sleep yesterday :(

Sorry to hear that Kay, give my love to everyonex

[blue marlin]

cheers hun here comes the tears

jogger would love my memory jogged too jogger321 haha

[Jackie]

Jogger 321 whatever you remember it was all Kays fault hahaha

[blue marlin]

guilty as charged haha

[caroll72]

Jackie, i felt exactly the same a couple of years back, couldn't decide wether to stay or go, even started a thread on it.
Just like you, it was a niggly feeling that something wasn't right/was missing, but couldn't put my finger on what it was.

We had jobs, sunshine, meals out, and family in tenerife, no worries, but for some reason, i still felt restless.
We made the move back to uk a year ago & have a home & jobs, just no sunshine, yet i still feel restless.

Don't know what it us, maybe age related?? but i often wish i could jump on a plane & come back to the rock.

Hope you make the right decision.

[tonypub]

nursing home is calling:whistle:

[Jackie]

Jackie, i felt exactly the same a couple of years back, couldn't decide wether to stay or go, even started a thread on it.
Just like you, it was a niggly feeling that something wasn't right/was missing, but couldn't put my finger on what it was.

We had jobs, sunshine, meals out, and family in tenerife, no worries, but for some reason, i still felt restless.
We made the move back to uk a year ago & have a home & jobs, just no sunshine, yet i still feel restless.

Don't know what it us, maybe age related?? but i often wish i could jump on a plane & come back to the rock.

Hope you make the right decision.

That's why I don't think I will go back to the UK because it's not anything that I can put my finger on so know it's nothing to do with actually living here. To be honest I really think it was the fact that kids have gone now because things seem to be getting better the more I get used to that fact. Just need to find a good man now haha


nursing home is calling:whistle:


Not just yet :)

[windowcleaningm]

People get to a stage in there life where they look back and can,t find what they wanted to acheive, hence they haven,t acheived it.
For someone who has given everything and having read your postings i wish you everthing in life because it looks like you deserve it.
Hope you soon get that bite on the backside.
Regards willy.

Sorry about the capitals , fonts up the wall

[longtallalice]

Not been on for a few days and seen this , think me and you need a night out soon or even night in who cares x will be in touch you are not going anywhere lady x

[Balcony]

Parents worst nightmare...there's a time you want the kids to grow up and be independant....then they are. Suddenly (and I suspect this is more of a mum's thing) you don't feel needed any more; you don't feel complete.

Your daughter settled here very easily because she came with you and took her lead from you. Your son probably looked at Tenerife as a place for holidays because he didn't come out at the same time. But look at them both and feel proud of what YOU did to raise them.

My mum was the same with me throughout my wife. Owe her a lot. They might not always say it, but they know it too.

The insecure feelings will soon pass. Find your positives in Tenerife.

[Jackie]

Parents worst nightmare...there's a time you want the kids to grow up and be independant....then they are. Suddenly (and I suspect this is more of a mum's thing) you don't feel needed any more; you don't feel complete.

Your daughter settled here very easily because she came with you and took her lead from you. Your son probably looked at Tenerife as a place for holidays because he didn't come out at the same time. But look at them both and feel proud of what YOU did to raise them.

My mum was the same with me throughout my wife. Owe her a lot. They might not always say it, but they know it too.

The insecure feelings will soon pass. Find your positives in Tenerife.

Balcony you have hit the nail on the head, that is exactly how i'm feeling....surplus to requirements lol

[Balcony]

You're a Mum: you'll never be surplus.