Things that don't make sense...........

[rosemary]

Why do people say 'off of'.......when all they really mean is 'off'.

He jumped off ......something
It fell off........something

What? A bridge? A boat? A mountain? A table?

What's the 'of' doing there?

[Santiago]

It,s the same people who say "reverse back" - where else are you going to reverse?

[obs]

Also, those who say "should of", "Could of" instead of "should have" "could have" etc. :redcard:

[9PLUS]

If you've listened to the Scottish they say "should ave" and "could ave" like the Welsh and Scots from the valleys which could well be 80% of the ******* (7 star people), it ends up sounding like "sho ve" & "cou ve". The more valley they are the more "have" starts sounding like "of"


Some British people may pick up on this retardation.



Cheers

X

[nomibucha]

If pro is the opposite of con does that mean Progress is the opposite of Congress?

Lol just one I know from the top of my head.

[canarybird]

And another growing annoyance is seeing the "d" dropped in the past tense of "used" when writing:

I use to ice skate when I was younger. Instead of I USED to....etc.

[ciderhunter]

We cannot stop the Americans bad English, but we can stop copying them. Americans keep getting to the end of a sentence and lobbing in the word 'Period'. Now a period can be anything from a nano second to eternity, so it's meaningless. I notice this bad English is being copied by, of all people, the English.

[rosemary]

If you've listened to the Scottish they say "should ave" and "could ave" like the Welsh and Scots from the valleys which could well be 80% of the ******* (7 star people), it ends up sounding like "sho ve" & "cou ve". The more valley they are the more "have" starts sounding like "of"



Some British people may pick up on this retardation



Cheers

X

AH but that is a dialect thing. It's different. Retardation?? Bit strong isn't it? Don't you mean degradation? Uh oh sounds worse. :flatcap:

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And another growing annoyance is seeing the "d" dropped in the past tense of "used" when writing:

I use to ice skate when I was younger. Instead of I USED to....etc.


I don't have friends who ever ice skated......:lol: but yes it's not on. And it's not off of either.

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Americans are responsible for a lot of degradation. My all time obsession is with 'like' as in 'I was saying let's go like' and he said 'oh yeah, like...' and we all went to the mall' like' to get something to eat 'like'.

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If pro is the opposite of con does that mean Progress is the opposite of Congress?

Lol just one I know from the top of my head.


You know it could be. It's not impossible. Progress meaning to go forward, Regress meaning to go backward, Congress meaning to stay still and think about it. It's what I do a lot of the time. :wink2:

[Malteser Monkey]

My all time obsession is with 'like' as in 'I was saying let's go like' and he said 'oh yeah, like...' and we all went to the mall' like' to get something to eat 'like'.


That's Liverpuddlians eh eh eh :D

[LUCKY]

I just love the title of the thread. Things that don't make sense .. So here i am ! :flatcap: :feret::feret:

And never mentioned Lower GDS once.

[Malteser Monkey]

I just love the title of the thread. Things that don't make sense .. So here i am ! :flatcap: :feret::feret:

And never mentioned Lower GDS once.

You make perfect sense to me :D

[rosemary]

Guys is there an Upper GDS by any chance? is it something to do with your lower half or is it place in Lower Lancs? Shall we do verbal charades? What am I?

[LUCKY]

Guys is there an Upper GDS by any chance? is it something to do with your lower half or is it place in Lower Lancs? Shall we do verbal charades? What am I?

Its not, What am I ? Its Where am I ? :flatcap:

[rosemary]

Its not, What am I ? Its Where am I ? :flatcap:

I see how cleverly you avoided my first question Moriaty.

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Where are we? Why are we here? What do we want?

[Malteser Monkey]

Lucky asked me if I had been on the sherry - think he has me confused with you Rosemary :D

What do we want ?- right now a nice slice of cheese on toast !

[canarybird]

How about the use of "awesome" (USA) or "brilliant" (UK) to describe something which probably wasn't, according to the original meaning of the word.

[Malteser Monkey]

and what about color then - it's COLOUR !:D

[canarybird]

Seen on FB:

http://canarybird.smugmug.com/Other/Miscellaneous-1/i-nxB2tds/0/M/Queen%20Elizabeth%20II-M.jpg

A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season. God Save the Queen!

PS: Only share this with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT humor)!

[rosemary]

How about the use of "awesome" (USA) or "brilliant" (UK) to describe something which probably wasn't, according to the original meaning of the word.

I think that's what they call urban talk CB. It denotes a lack of vocabulary or a disdain for it. So it's easier to retain. Currently there's a fascinating love story going on with Afro Caribbean patois. It's musical, it's rhymical, I like it. I love watching the British comedienne Catherine Tate doing her takeoff of a non black Bermondsey girl trying to rap with it. Painful.

But I love my English Language too much to want to degrade it in any way. That's another probem I have. I do not LOVE the Spanish language enough to want to commit it to memory. I prefer the softer more sympatica sound of Italian, the mother of them all. Why am I here? Where should I be?.......:dontknow:

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Seen on FB:

http://canarybird.smugmug.com/Other/Miscellaneous-1/i-nxB2tds/0/M/Queen%20Elizabeth%20II-M.jpg

A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season. God Save the Queen!

PS: Only share this with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT humor)!


I am in love with whoever wrote this. SUPERB!

[primrose]

This Thread.:dontknow:

[Malteser Monkey]

some of 9PLUS' posts

dear

:lol:

[primrose]

some of 9plus' posts

dear

:lol:

Only some :whistle:

[rosemary]

And there's another.......'very' unique. What's the 'very' there for?

Of course this thread doesn't make sense. It wasn't meant to Ha Ha...but I am enjoying it. And it is informative.

[Malteser Monkey]

"New and Improved"

really ?

[ribuck]

... Americans keep getting to the end of a sentence and lobbing in the word 'Period'. Now a period can be anything from a nano second to eternity, so it's meaningless.

"Period" is the american word for a "full stop". Maybe their usage makes sense now. Nothing to do with nanoseconds or eternity.

[primrose]

People that put hehe, haha,and lol always reminds me of this song every time I read it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fn36l_z3WY

[rosemary]

People that put hehe, haha,and lol always reminds me of this song every time I read it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fn36l_z3WY


It's OK primrose ....you are amongst friends here....ha ha..he he..

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'We don't have none' which actually must mean 'we have some'.

[Santiago]

There is nothing worse than hearing someone say, "Me and John ...........". Why ME first, why not, "John and I .........."?

[LUCKY]

Happy hour and it lasts more than 60 minutes

[warbey]

I really get annoyed with People, especially Young Ones, in a Shop or elsewhere,

handing You Your Purchase saying "There You go". It drives Me Mad, and it's become widespread....


It Doesn't Mean anything.!!!!!

[Santiago]

Or the ones on the phone who ask you "Is that Mrs Xxxxx?" and then say fantastic when you say yes!!

[Malteser Monkey]

She's the cat's mother ??

IS she really :D