Who will have the last word?

[starling]

"I always like to feel the breeze
Blowing in above ma knees"
Wrong thread MM ..... Limericks are on another :doh:

[Medman]

Wrong thread MM ..... Limericks are on another :doh:

Oh dear what can I say
I don't know any another way ............... *gets coat*

[starling]

Oh dear what can I say
I don't know any another way ............... *gets coat*

...... Typical male!

[Medman]

...... Typical male!

Ah, but it's a lovely cosy coat from my wife ......... :raspberry2:

[starling]

Ah, but it's a lovely cosy coat from my wife ......... :raspberry2:

...... I know the sort - Wolf in sheeps clothing!

[hackney58]

...... I know the sort - Wolf in sheeps clothing!

Better than mutton done up as lamb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[starling]

Better than mutton done up as lamb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It takes one to know one :whistle:

[Medman]

It takes one to know one :whistle:

Or a pig in a blanket ............ :lol:

[starling]

Or a pig in a blanket ............ :lol:

Do you mean a sausage roll?

[Medman]

Do you mean a sausage roll?

No, no; that's something completely different (ala Python) It's chipolata sausages wrapped in bacon.

http://www.food.com/recipe/pigs-in-blankets-bacon-and-sausage-rolls-for-christmas-trimmings-272576

[Fender1]

Antidisestablishmentarianism

[Medman]

Antidisestablishmentarianism

Yip, that's a word (and a half) Did someone say a half ..ok ... :cheers2:

[Fender1]

Have to get off here for now ---- The wife's nagging me !!! Ah'll Be Back !!!

[starling]

Have to get off here for now ---- The wife's nagging me !!! Ah'll Be Back !!!

............Sound's like you've started a bit too early!!!

[hackney58]

............Sound's like you've started a bit too early!!!

you can never start too early!!!!!!!!!Happy new year babe x

[starling]

you can never start too early!!!!!!!!!Happy new year babe x
Same to you fellow countryman :party2::party3::party4::cheers:

[Fender1]

I was going to say "You can never start too early !!!" but hackney58 has already done so.

Happy New Year, when it comes, to both of you, all in England and throughout the World !!!

My wife has now stopped nagging, for at least 5 minutes !!!

[starling]

Happy Hogmany to you too Fender1 :party4::party2::party3::cheers:

[Fender1]

Muchas Gracias !!!

[starling]

Muchas Gracias !!!

De Nada .....

[Santiago]

Corr, what's going on? I have had no landline phone since Christmas Eve and no broadband since Boxing Day so haven't been able to keep up!

Anyway, Happy New Year to one and all - may you have everything you wish for!!!

[warbey]

Same to You Hun.

Wet conditions to blame.? Theyre an excuse for most things.

If We were to post something at 23.59 Tonight, would that qualify for Last Word.?

[starling]

Same to You Hun.

Wet conditions to blame.? Theyre an excuse for most things.

If We were to post something at 23.59 Tonight, would that qualify for Last Word.?

Only if the world ends at midnight.

[Medman]

Only if the world ends at midnight.

Ok Cinderella ........ :D

[Santiago]

Well, did it end at midnight? I am so cut off down here that I know nothing!

However, it's quite a bright morning so perhaps I am in Paradise. At least I had the first words for 2013!!!

[warbey]

Well, did it end at midnight? I am so cut off down here that I know nothing!

However, it's quite a bright morning so perhaps I am in Paradise. At least I had the first words for 2013!!!

Bright Here too. Paradise No. Wrong Language..

[Santiago]

Wrong language? What language should I be using? Mind you, the wording on this mobile is so small that I can't read what I'm writing, so you could be reading any old ribbish!!!!!!

[warbey]

Wrong language? What language should I be using? Mind you, the wording on this mobile is so small that I can't read what I'm writing, so you could be reading any old ribbish!!!!!!



Paradise is maybe an Island where the People speak Spanish.?

Heavily diluted by English though.

[Medman]

Paradise is maybe an Island where the People speak Spanish.?

Heavily diluted by English though.

And heavily diluted by alcohol ! ... :D .. :cheers:

[Santiago]

Especially when invaded by Scottish grandfathers!

Hope Isla enjoyed her first Christmas!!!!

[Medman]

Especially when invaded by Scottish grandfathers!

Hope Isla enjoyed her first Christmas!!!!

Ha ha, has been known. Isla well behaved as always. Next year will be better with her walking and talking by that time. We were baby sitting on Hogmanay so a very quiet one for us this year (2 beers !!)

[Santiago]

Isn't she a bit young for a couple of beers, or do they start 'em young north of the border?

[Medman]

Isn't she a bit young for a couple of beers, or do they start 'em young north of the border?

Got to bring them up in the faith ! :D Don't start her on the shorts till next year.

Is your broadband still down ?

[Santiago]

They breed 'em tough then!
Still no broadband or phone. Bt said 4th J an, then said it would be longer! Apparently there are a lot of people in the village who have been cut off in their prime. A very nice Indian gentleman told me they were doing everything they could but I didn't know my phone line went through Mumbai - no wonder they have problems!!

[Medman]

They breed 'em tough then!
Still no broadband or phone. Bt said 4th J an, then said it would be longer! Apparently there are a lot of people in the village who have been cut off in their prime. A very nice Indian gentleman told me they were doing everything they could but I didn't know my phone line went through Mumbai - no wonder they have problems!!

He will be trying to sikh out the problem. What a curry on........ :D

[Santiago]

Very good! Goa way and play!

[Medman]

Very good! Goa way and play!

So saree ST .......

[warbey]

:lol:I never knew the Ganges ran through Tenerife, Sahib.....:D:D




Mumbai Duck doesnt sound at all right.?

[Fender1]

Try Mumbai Haggis !!!

[Medman]

Try Mumbai Haggis !!!

Try catching one first !!

[warbey]

Try Mumbai Haggis !!!


I nearly Googled Sheep there....:spin::spin::D


Best carry a Portion in Yer Sporran.....hic...

[Medman]

I nearly Googled Sheep there....:spin::spin::D


Best carry a Portion in Yer Sporran.....hic...

That's compulsory in Wales apparently !

[starling]

That's compulsory in Wales apparently !

..... And if you've ever been - you'll know why :whistle:

[Medman]

..... And if you've ever been - you'll know why :whistle:

Good looking sheep ???

[starling]

Good looking sheep ???

Since when have you looked at the mantel piece when poking the fire ???

[Medman]

Since when have you looked at the mantel piece when poking the fire ???

After the fire's gone out ......... :crylaughing:

[starling]

After the fire's gone out ......... :crylaughing:

Aye, but there's still a good glow burning under an old thatch.

[Medman]

Aye, but there's still a good glow burning under an old thatch.

Ah we all like glow jobs ....... *in best Chinese accent* .....:devil2:

[starling]

Ah we all like glow jobs ....... *in best Chinese accent* .....:devil2:

... What with Welsh sheep :confused:

[Medman]

... What with Welsh sheep :confused:

Now we are getting weird ........... :spin: :D

[starling]

Now we are getting weird ........... :spin: :D

'Ewe' started it?

[Medman]

'Ewe' started it?

"It wasn't me" he said sheepishly ... :ashamed:

[starling]

"It wasn't me" he said sheepishly ... :ashamed:

Panto season....... 'Oh yes it was.'

[Medman]

Panto season....... 'Oh yes it was.'

Is that during Ramadan ?

[starling]

Is that during Ramadan ?

....... No. The Festival of Britain.

[Medman]

....... No. The Festival of Britain.

Flock sake .......

[starling]

Flock sake .......

What's your big interest in Welsh Sheep?

[Medman]

What's your big interest in Welsh Sheep?

It's all getting a bit wooly now

[starling]

It's all getting a bit wooly now

Yea..... I'm off before I get sheared. Night night.

[Medman]

Yea..... I'm off before I get sheared. Night night.

Bah Humbug ......... :raspberry2:

[Santiago]

Calcutta. haggis in half and ate it now he won't fit into his Jodhpur!

[Medman]

Calcutta. haggis in half and ate it now he won't fit into his Jodhpur!

Did Cal buy it at the New Delhicatessen ?

[Santiago]

Yes, and Himalaya some eggs to put in there too!

[Medman]

Yes, and Himalaya some eggs to put in there too!

Did his Mumbai it for him ?

[Santiago]

Did his Mumbai it for him ?

No, Ahmadabad decision and got it instead!

[Medman]

No, Ahmadabad decision and got it instead!

Don't feel too Baddi about it, Damoh can be done about it now

[Santiago]

Don't Lucknow but Mysore feet are killing me!!

[warbey]

.


Meanwhile nearer the Alps a Sherpa begins Tensing for the Journey.

[Fender1]

In Glesca we caw it a trip

[Medman]

In Glesca we caw it a trip

Or maybe even a wee jant !

[Santiago]

Down here it's just called an experience!

[starling]

Down here it's just called an experience!

Up here we ask 'Ow Much?'

[Medman]

Up here we ask 'Ow Much?'

You're down to me and up to ST .........:spin:

[starling]

You're down to me and up to ST .........:spin:

I'm down to both of you just now......... in sunny Tenerife. :hello:

[Medman]

I'm down to both of you just now......... in sunny Tenerife. :hello:

Shat----------up

[starling]

Shat----------up

......Love you too :sunburn:

[Medman]

......Love you too :sunburn:

Is your second name Riley ? ....... you certainly have his life ... :D

[starling]

Is your second name Riley ? ....... you certainly have his life ... :D

....... Goes with the job :airplane::superstar:

[Medman]

....... Goes with the job :airplane::superstar:

You're a pilot !!! ???

[starling]

You're a pilot !!! ???

...... If I tell you - I'll have to kill you.

[hackney58]

...... If I tell you - I'll have to kill you.

You must be a cook then!!

[Diligent]

I think i have the last word!

[hackney58]

I think i have the last word!

Only if it's Zyxomma (as in Collins New English Dictionary)

[Medman]

Only if it's Zyxomma (as in Collins New English Dictionary)

Will that be the first word in Sheila's Old Australian Dictionary ? ............. :D

[hackney58]

Will that be the first word in Sheila's Old Australian Dictionary ? ............. :D

Could be a problem if dyslectic, in fact you would say it's criminal.

[Medman]

Could be a problem if dyslectic, in fact you would say it's criminal.

Or even lincrami ............ :spin:

[Santiago]

Or p'raps just das?

[starling]

Or p'raps just das?

Mh riwvpg caf lohij sdtraebil ftpuit bi!

[Medman]

Mh riwvpg caf lohij sdtraebil ftpuit bi!

Took the words right out of my mouth ......... :doh:

[starling]

Took the words right out of my mouth ......... :doh:

I didn't know you could understand Lirciebiawn ..... Well Done :c2:

[Medman]

I didn't know you could understand Lirciebiawn ..... Well Done :c2:

Not joosta puretti face ........ :ashamed:

[starling]

Not joosta puretti face ........ :ashamed:

.............Ture :agree:

[Medman]

.............Ture :agree:

De France ?

[starling]

De France ?

Naaah.... Tenerife :sunburn:

[Medman]

Naaah.... Tenerife :sunburn:

Vive La Reef ........

[Santiago]

Adiós lluvia, Hola frío!

[Medman]

Adiós lluvia, Hola frío!

Bye bye brolly , hi thermals ??

[Santiago]

Bye bye brolly , hi thermals ??

Sort of .......................:cheeky:

[Medman]

Sort of .......................:cheeky:

My Canarian isn't what it used to be ....... :D

[starling]

My Canarian isn't what it used to be ....... :D

You're probably not giving it the right food - Tweet tweet!

[Medman]

You're probably not giving it the right food - Tweet tweet!

I never was a Trill seeker ........... :lol:

[starling]

I never was a Trill seeker ........... :lol:

Chirrup... Chirrup ... Shurrup.

[Medman]

Chirrup... Chirrup ... Shurrup.

Have I ruffled your feathers ?

[starling]

Have I ruffled your feathers ?

It's the c**k that crows.....not the chicks!

Oops - Had to do some editing.

[Medman]

It's the c**k that crows.....not the chicks!

Oops - Had to do some editing.

Just a flight of fancy

[starling]

Just a flight of fancy

Well that's how it goes... One day you're the c**k-of-the north. Next day - a feather duster!

[Medman]

Well that's how it goes... One day you're the c**k-of-the north. Next day - a feather duster!

I've never been a feather duster ............... :whistle:

[starling]

I've never been a feather duster ............... :whistle:

That's how it goes - ONE DAY YOU'RE THE...................

[Medman]

That's how it goes - ONE DAY YOU'RE THE...................

Looking forward to being handled by a French maid........... :eyebrows:

[starling]

Looking forward to being handled by a French maid........... :eyebrows:

Careful where you get stuffed!

[Medman]

Careful where you get stuffed!

I always do ......... :D

[starling]

I always do ......... :D

What? with a feather duster :wow:

[Medman]

What? with a feather duster :wow:

If it's good enough for Ken Dodd ...........

[starling]

If it's good enough for Ken Dodd ...........

Well..... If you really wanna look and.............. say no more.

[Medman]

Well..... If you really wanna look and.............. say no more.

Good for dusting down your tax returns apparently ......... :D

[starling]

Good for dusting down your tax returns apparently ......... :D

..... Not that good - apparently :(

[Medman]

..... Not that good - apparently :(

He made a clean sweep by all accounts

[starling]

He made a clean sweep by all accounts

... Sure you're not getting him mixed up with Sooty?

[Medman]

... Sure you're not getting him mixed up with Sooty?

He's sueing the BBC as well for a hand up his b*m for years

[starling]

He's sueing the BBC as well for a hand up his b*m for years

...... Have you had a hand in it?

[Medman]

...... Have you had a hand in it?

It's a pu..........ppet !

[starling]

It's a pu..........ppet !

:singing:On a string :singing::singing:

[hackney58]

:singing:On a string :singing::singing:

Muffin the mule................

[starling]

Muffin the mule................

And the Woodentops!

[Medman]

And the Woodentops!

At least that's not a crime !

[starling]

At least that's not a crime !

What stringing someone up????

[Medman]

What stringing someone up????

When you put it like that !

[starling]

When you put it like that !

Shame...............:twak:

[Medman]

Shame...............:twak:

Or maybe it was like this .... aha .........(in best Tommy Cooper voice)

[starling]

Or maybe it was like this .... aha .........(in best Tommy Cooper voice)

..... Or ...just like that.....

[Medman]

..... Or ...just like that.....

That's how he died......... :shy:

[starling]

That's how he died......... :shy:

Didn't swallow a fly then?

[Medman]

Didn't swallow a fly then?

Perhaps .. :dontknow:

[hackney58]

Perhaps .. :dontknow:

But not likely

[Medman]

But not likely

One never knows ....... :queen:

[starling]

One never knows ....... :queen:

Is that the end then?

[Medman]

Is that the end then?

The end of what ?

[starling]

The end of what ?

................You started it..................?

[Medman]

................You started it..................?

Oh no I didn't

[starling]

Oh no I didn't

Oh Yes YOU Did!

[Medman]

Oh Yes YOU Did!

Says who ?

[hackney58]

Says who ?

don't ask me......

[Medman]

don't ask me......

Why not ? .............

[hackney58]

Why not ? .............

It's not my problem.......

[Medman]

It's not my problem.......

What problem ?

[starling]

What problem ?

Your problem.....

[Medman]

Your problem.....

It's not my problem

[starling]

It's not my problem

Why do you keep repeating yourself?

[hackney58]

Why do you keep repeating yourself?

Who knows he's from Scotland!

[starling]

Who knows he's from Scotland!

Could be worse ... He could be from Wales :doh:

[hackney58]

Could be worse ... He could be from Wales :doh:

Worse still Lancishire...............

[starling]

Worse still Lancishire...............

Aye.... At least we live on the RIGHT side of the pennines!

[Medman]

Aye.... At least we live on the RIGHT side of the pennines!

That's correct...I mean right ... :crazy:

[starling]

That's correct...I mean right ... :crazy:

Does that mean I'm top of the class?

[Medman]

Does that mean I'm top of the class?

For now, so don't move your books....... :crylaughing:

[starling]

For now, so don't move your books....... :crylaughing:

...Okay teach :cheeky:

[Medman]

...Okay teach :cheeky:

Just call me Sir ......... :D

[starling]

Just call me Sir ......... :D

Puuullleeaase...........Sir

[Medman]

Puuullleeaase...........Sir

Memories indeed ........... Fenn Street Gang

[starling]

Memories indeed ........... Fenn Street Gang

....... Before my time Sir :wink:

[Medman]

....... Before my time Sir :wink:

Before you bedtime maybe !:laugh:

[starling]

Before you bedtime maybe !:laugh:

Watershed time :cheeky:

[Medman]

Watershed time :cheeky:

Ah, before you wet the bed !

[starling]

Ah, before you wet the bed !

......Cheeky :cheeky: :shy:

[Medman]

......Cheeky :cheeky: :shy:

All meant in the best po--------------ssible taste ....*crosses and uncrosses legs*

[starling]

All meant in the best po--------------ssible taste ....*crosses and uncrosses legs*

That's okay then Kenny!

[Medman]

That's okay then Kenny!

Could you be my Cleo ?

[starling]

Could you be my Cleo ?

.......:blowkiss::superstar::bootyshake::wow: Before I get carried away ...
OW MUCH !!!

[Medman]

.......:blowkiss::superstar::bootyshake::wow: Before I get carried away ...
OW MUCH !!!

Just the good bits ............ :whistle:

[starling]

Just the good bits ............ :whistle:

..... Good enough.

[Medman]

..... Good enough.

Both Happy ............. :jumping:.. :jumping:

[starling]

Both Happy ............. :jumping:.. :jumping:

..... Like Pinky & Perky

[Medman]

..... Like Pinky & Perky

Are you telling porkies?

[starling]

Are you telling porkies?

If I am will I get a roasting?

[Medman]

If I am will I get a roasting?

Yip, on the spit. One good turn deserves another.

[starling]

Yip, on the spit. One good turn deserves another.

... Like taking turns in the barrel?

[Medman]

... Like taking turns in the barrel?

Just don't get stuck in the corner ....... :crazy:

[starling]

Just don't get stuck in the corner ....... :crazy:

Roll out the barrel...... Lets have a ........:cheers: :singing:

[Medman]

Roll out the barrel...... Lets have a ........:cheers: :singing:

Let it pour , let it pour, let it pour ......... :romeo:

[starling]

Let it pour , let it pour, let it pour ......... :romeo:

Oasis in the desert.

[Medman]

Oasis in the desert.

Blur in the hills

[starling]

Blur in the hills

Gracie in the Fields

[Medman]

Gracie in the Fields

Stones in the kidneys ...........

[starling]

Stones in the kidneys ...........

Fleetwood Mac ...... in Blackpool

[Medman]

Fleetwood Mac ...... in Blackpool

Clash in the Titans (sounds sore)

[starling]

Clash in the Titans (sounds sore)

Meat Loaf ..... in the bakery.

[Medman]

Meat Loaf ..... in the bakery.

Genesis in the beginning

[starling]

Genesis in the beginning

Arctic Monkeys ..... in the Arctic

[Medman]

Arctic Monkeys ..... in the Arctic

Pacemakers in the hospital

[starling]

Pacemakers in the hospital

..........With Gerry under the Bed :wink2:

[hackney58]

..........With Gerry under the Bed :wink2:

Beds in Bedlam

[Medman]

Beds in Bedlam

Gorillas in the mist

[starling]

Gorillas in the mist

Stones in Stonehenge.

[Medman]

Stones in Stonehenge.

Hollies in the Ivy

[starling]

Hollies in the Ivy

Boys in the pet shop.

[Medman]

Boys in the pet shop.

Crickets in the pitch

[starling]

Crickets in the pitch

The Housemartins under the eaves.

[Medman]

The Housemartins under the eaves.

Honeycombs in the hive ..........

- - - - - - - - - - merged double post - - - - - - - - - -


The Housemartins under the eaves.

Honeycombs in the hive ..........

[starling]

Honeycombs in the hive ..........

- - - - - - - - - - merged double post - - - - - - - - - -



Honeycombs in the hive ..........

The Birds in the Aviary........

[Medman]

The Birds in the Aviary........

Eagles in the aerie ..........

[starling]

Eagles in the aerie ..........

Bay City Rollers in the Surf.................

[Medman]

Bay City Rollers in the Surf.................

Badfinger in the pie

[starling]

Badfinger in the pie

Mud in the swamp

[Medman]

Mud in the swamp

Sweet in the pudding .........

[starling]

Sweet in the pudding .........

Wizard in Oz..........

[Santiago]

Wizard in Oz..........

Smokie next door to Alice .......

[Medman]

Smokie next door to Alice .......

Herd in the field ..........

[starling]

Herd in the field ..........

Carpenters in the forest.... Or woodyard!

[Medman]

Carpenters in the forest.... Or woodyard!

Cardigans in the hosiery

[starling]

Cardigans in the hosiery

Metallica in the steelworks.

[Medman]

Metallica in the steelworks.

Drifters in the plain

[starling]

Drifters in the plain

The Who ....... Where?

[Medman]

The Who ....... Where?

Pulp in the papermill

[starling]

Pulp in the papermill

Wet Wet Wet in the UK

[Medman]

Wet Wet Wet in the UK

Dire Straits in the UK

[starling]

Dire Straits in the UK

Traffic in a jam

[Medman]

Traffic in a jam

Jam in the piece .......

[starling]

Jam in the piece .......

The animals in the Zoo

[Medman]

The animals in the Zoo

Loony Tunes in the asylum (or is it Shenanigans ?)

[starling]

Loony Tunes in the asylum (or is it Shenanigans ?)

Earth Wind & Fire in Australia

[Medman]

Earth Wind & Fire in Australia

Train in the station

[starling]

Train in the station

Nazareth in the Holy Land

[Medman]

Nazareth in the Holy Land

Police in the office

[starling]

Police in the office

The Beach Boys at the seaside

[Medman]

The Beach Boys at the seaside

Queen in the palace

[starling]

Queen in the palace

Jefferson Airplane on the air

[Medman]

Jefferson Airplane on the air

Rainbow in the sky

[starling]

Rainbow in the sky

Bananarama in Banana Garden

[Medman]

Bananarama in Banana Garden

Cranberries in the sauce

[Santiago]

Cranberries in the sauce

"Take That" in the ring

[Medman]

"Take That" in the ring

Monkees in the zoo ...........

[starling]

Monkees in the zoo ...........

America in the USA

[Medman]

America in the USA

Sparks in the fusebox

[starling]

Sparks in the fusebox

UB40 In the dole queue

[Medman]

UB40 In the dole queue

Killers in the court

[starling]

Killers in the court

Sting in the Hive

[Medman]

Sting in the Hive

Wings in the airforce

[starling]

Wings in the airforce

Pearl Jam in a jar

[Medman]

Pearl Jam in a jar

ABC in the alphabet

[starling]

ABC in the alphabet

Neil Young in the nursery

[Medman]

Neil Young in the nursery

Band Aid in the first aid box

[starling]

Band Aid in the first aid box

Manic Street Preachers in the pulpit

[Medman]

Manic Street Preachers in the pulpit

Chic in the boutique

[starling]

Chic in the boutique

R. Kelly in the Isle of Man......

[Medman]

R. Kelly in the Isle of Man......

Fine Young Cannibals in the jungle

[starling]

Fine Young Cannibals in the jungle

Cheryl Crow in the nest

[Medman]

Cheryl Crow in the nest

4 Non Blondes in the hairdressers

[starling]

4 Non Blondes in the hairdressers
Boys II Men in the Mens room

[hackney58]

Boys II Men in the Mens room

Yorkshire in the puddings

[starling]

Yorkshire in the puddings

Hotpots in Lancashire