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View Full Version : How to start a fight


jose cuervo
07-09-2011, 14:20
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds." I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started......
murph
07-09-2011, 14:38
I hit a car stationary at the traffic lights. I got out and so did the fella who I had hit - tiny little guy only about 5ft 2in tall.

As he approached me he said '''I'm not happy'' .

''Which one are you then?'' I asked - and that's when the fight started!

:D
Ecky Thump
07-09-2011, 15:05
My wife asked me if the dress she was wearing made her look fat,
I replied.."Not as much as the one you were wearing yesterday"

Then the fight started!
AL JAY
07-09-2011, 15:10
My wife asked me to buy her an animal skin coat for her birthday!!!

I bought her a Donkey Jacket..... thats when the fight started!
jose cuervo
07-09-2011, 15:22
My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV? I said, "Dust."
And then the fight started...
TOTO 99
07-09-2011, 15:40
I was walking to the shop the other day and as I turned the corner I slipped in a load off dog pooh.
A minute later a bloke comes round the corner and does exactly the same thing.
As he was picking himself up I went over and said to him " I just did that ".........and then the fight started :laugh:
AL JAY
07-09-2011, 15:45
My wife said she fancied going on holiday to Goa in India
I said " If you went there you would be Sacred!!!

thats when the fight started
CIM
07-09-2011, 17:00
When I got home from work last night, my wife demanded that I take her out somewhere expensive... so, I took her to the petrol station. And then the fight started...

The year before last, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a funeral plot and headstone as a Christmas gift. The next year, I didn't buy her anything. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's when the fight started.....
YOUNG GOLFER
07-09-2011, 17:35
When i came home from work my wife said we should try a new position i said(excited) ok let's do it....so she laid on the sofa and i started the ironing....and that's when the fight started.......


When i came home from work my wife said we should try a new position i said(excited) ok let's do it....so she laid on the sofa and i started the ironing....and that's when the fight started.......

My wife said she wanted to slip into something nice and comfortable....so i suggested a coffin....and that' when the fight started.
AL JAY
07-09-2011, 19:01
My wife said she wanted to go to a place that had thousands of Liverpool fans
I said you have been to Devon loads of times! And im not keen on Norway either!!!

Thats when the fight started
slodgedad
07-09-2011, 19:59
Carol and I were watching “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” in bed.. I asked her, “Do you want to have sex?”

“No,” she answered.

So I said, “Is that your final answer?”

”Yes.” she replied

So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.”

And then the fight started….
jose cuervo
08-09-2011, 09:10
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
I replied, "Your eyesight's near perfect."
And then the fight started........