His rescue was hampered by the fact that he didn't have time to shave his legs and trim his beard, nevertheless he pushed the boundaries of his physical limits to breaking point then Starling appeared with embrocation oil to relieve his aching muscles and sooth his flagging energy levels. He opened his tin of beans and asked her to unzip his sporran allowing his Crown Jewels to be on public display for all to admire and fondle in order to entice the princesses of the Women's Voluntary Institute, they were really tired of Medmans insistence that he demonstrate the workings of his internal rhythm machine that beat to the sound of Indian pipes and drums played by the curry appreciation society from the Balti House in Mumbai Avenue next to the Chinese laundrette where Welsh Wendy washed her smalls in exotic perfumed bubbles and foam singing and laughing like Widow Twanky after taking her tablets given by Doctor Doolittle who specialised in happy clapping at the temple of love. The head preacher man's son wanted some of these but she would never share because the tablets possessed special effects that totally amazed Medman who had never grown out of his love for Becks and bratwurst. Welsh Wendy however shared Martin's love
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